I figured it out!!! YAY

I figured out why I have ONLY been outperforming Cooper Manning, and it isn’t just because he is lazy!!!!! There are three things that I have to do to get my mojo back (I love Austin Powers that is probably one of my most favorite moves EVER!!!!). Larry Mayer (I also love John Mayer) wrote an article about me where he explains everything. Check it out here

The fourth-year pro believes that the solution is to simply relax, have fun and
just play football. Don’t over-think or make things too complicated. Just
read
and react.

Basically here are the three things I need to do:
Simply Relax
Have Fun
Just play football

BTW I came up with these three things last night when I was watching the Office (totally awesome show).

Ok lets break down each one individually.

1. Simply Relax
Remember last week when I completed 6 of 19 passes and threw 3 interceptions. Well…..I wasn’t relaxed at all. In fact I was like TOTALLY stressed out the entire game. I was talking with my new friend Todd last night and he suggested that we enroll in yoga classes together. We have a class tonight, I will let you know how it turns out (eeek). This should help me relax during the game!

2. Have Fun
I love playing football for the Chicago Bears but I don’t have any fun when the fans boo me. I know most of them are as drunk as Kyle on a Friday night but it still hurts my feelings and makes playing not fun at all. Well, this week we are playing in Saint Louis and that is in a totally different state so I shouldn’t have to worry about that.

3. Just play football
Remember when we played the Patriots and it was REALLY loud and I dropped the snap from Pro Bowl center Olin Kreutz on the 6th yard line, well that is not playing football. That is actually soccer because once I put the ball on the field everyone was trying to kick it just like it was the World Cup or something. This week I will focus on playing football and not soccer or any other sport that isn’t football. And I am not trying to say other sports are bad, I like country line dancing, but I think it will help our team if I only play football during the game.

I know that if I can do these three things I should be able to at least double, maybe triple, my passer rating from last week.

Sorry for the long post but I am excited about my new strategy,
Rex

p.s. I loved the article but there was one small fact he got wrong

Grossman’s anemic 1.3 passer rating in last Sunday’s 23-13 division-clinching
victory over the Minnesota Vikings was the lowest by a winning quarterback in
the NFL in 35 years.

I am NOT anemic, I have never made myself throw up on purpose, that is just gross. Get your facts right next time, LARRY!!!!!